Thursday, May 2, 2013

The Hardest Thing

6/30 : What's the hardest thing you have ever experienced. 


Trying to figure out the hardest thing I've ever experienced, has been the hardest thing! I've come back to this post several times and just stare at the blank screen... There is one big experience that comes to mind every time I think of what to write about but I hesitate to even mention it because its way too personal.

I've had a relatively easy life. Nothing very life changing. No deaths, accidents, etc which I'm very grateful for! Moving was always hard but I wouldn't consider it the hardest thing I've experienced.

When Josh and I started dating it didn't take very long before I knew I loved him and wanted to marry him. So why did it take us 2 years to finally get married?! Because for a while we weren't thinking in an eternal perspective. I don't want to bore you with the details, let's just say we weren't living our lives the way we should have been. Realizing that we needed to make some major changes, we both went to our bishops and started this long process. At least it seemed very long at the time. This wasn't the hardest part....

The hardest part was putting aside my fears and telling my parents the truth. All they have ever wanted for me was to be happy. To live the gospel and to be married in the temple. How was I suppose to tell the two people I love the most that I had disappointed them? That everything wasn't fine like I had been saying it was? That I wasn't truly happy? I don't remember how exactly how the conversation went, but I do remember my dad asking my to read them my patriarchal blessing. After reading that to them out loud, I realized everything was going to be okay. All they had to say was nothing but encouraging words. That they loved me and were proud of me for choosing to better my life. And that they were there for me.

Looking back now I'm very grateful to have gone through this experience. There have been nothing but good things since. It has giving me a greater knowledge and appreciation for the atonement. My testimony has grown and Josh and I are different and better people than we were almost 3 years ago! I'm also grateful Josh and I did this together. We've only been married for seven months, and it is so comforting to know that we will be together for eternity. Going through the temple for the time with Josh was the the happiest I have ever been! What made it even better was having my parents there with me and my mom by my side the entire time! Getting there wasn't easy but it was totally worth it!






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